Claiming Humble, Healthy Power
In my work with clients, I have learned a great deal about healing, transformation, and relationship. I’ve also learned a lot through being a student and mentee of teachers, gurus, and guides. It has been a passion of mine to explore these kinds of relationships, because as a sensitive, intuitive empath, I see many of the pitfalls, lessons, and blind spots often overlooked. I’ve probably watched every fallen guru documentary that exists, and this has been hugely informative in how I cultivate integrity in my work with those who come to me for healing.
Over this past eclipse season, I’ve had powerful realizations about what it means to have integrity as someone who influences others on their life path. I know some people look to me as an authority on healing, and that is a huge responsibility—one I don’t take lightly. It is my job to reflect back to my clients that they are the authors of their own lives, with an intuition and body they must listen to and trust. There is power there for them to claim when they do. One thing that has become extremely clear to me is that most people are terrified of their own power—because with great power comes great responsibility. Believe me, I’m right there with you. Wielding a sword is a practice that requires deep respect.
And it is with wisdom that we must approach our personal power. The ego is eager to claim credit, and the spiritual ego is one slippery, sneaky sucker. We can feel convinced we’re on our spiritual path, only to discover we've deluded ourselves once again. Power is something deeply misunderstood. It’s something I tread carefully around—while still having the courage to keep learning about it. It’s an essential part of fulfilling our personal and spiritual mission in this life. Getting comfortable with making messes—and cleaning them up—becomes another essential part of the initiation.
The key tenets I’ve been distilling lately revolve around humility, curiosity, and doubt. There is a healthy amount of doubt that’s necessary to work with—to test, to question, to discern truth and validity. This is how we come to know what is for us and what is not. No one else can tell us. We can gain perspectives, but ultimately, we are the only ones who can decide. Learning to trust ourselves is also core to this initiation. That doesn’t mean we need to throw the baby out with the bathwater—not at all. We must have the capacity for nuance, paradox, and multiplicity. We can be forged in the fire of challenge, which strengthens us as leaders for Truth and for Love—as we know it. Holding others in compassion, remembering we are all still imperfect, faulty humans. We will never be able to hold the whole Truth in all its complexity. We can carry our piece of the fractal puzzle, but we cannot grip it too tightly, or we risk suffocating the very life we’re trying to nurture.
We also need to be extremely brave—willing to be deeply uncomfortable and to let go of the shore, even when we don’t know what’s up or down. We may need to release everything we thought we knew. We may need to be humiliated. To feel the full depth of the emotions we so often want to annihilate—shame, grief, embarrassment, devastation, powerlessness, worthlessness, disgust, fear, terror, anguish. Within this realm of abandoned, rejected, denied feelings lies a great deal of energy. And what I’ve found is that at some point, we get stopped in our tracks—maybe by extreme fatigue, a loss like death, divorce, disease—in order to finally meet and digest these blocks of resistance in our system.
This can be done alone. But I can tell you, as someone who has consciously devoted herself to this work for a lifetime, even then I circled far and wide around the core of it for decades—until I actually started asking for help to really go into the meat of the pain. I am considered brave by those who know me, and still, I knew nothing of the courage it would take to go into the depths required to resuscitate the parts of me I had disowned, disguised, and relegated to the dark basement of my Being.
This work continues for me—and it will. I think this is one of the beautiful aspects of my work: I meet people in it. I am not above it. But I have learned how to keep my head above water, and how to bound my own process so I can stay fully present and committed to yours. I only allow you into my shared experience when it is truly in service to your healing. And this level of vulnerability is a special ingredient I often find missing in many teachers, guides, mentors, or coaches. I find it disempowering when there is pedestalization or power-over dynamics in such relationships. My goal is to help you see, feel, and know yourself as powerful, creative, loving, and brave.
I support you in activating the areas of your life where you may have felt stuck, scared, or limited. Together, we look lovingly, compassionately, and honestly at what’s there. We look through a powerful lens: your somatic experience. This layer of your being can express far more than your thinking mind. It allows us to receive from the unconscious and subconscious, bringing clarity and integrated wisdom that expands our energy and our lives into a fullness beyond what we could imagine.